Am I a People Pleaser?
Original exploration. Not a validated psychological measure.
In which situations do I put other people's feelings before my own, and what is it costing me?
Twenty-nine everyday situations with a partner, a parent, friends, coworkers, relatives and people you barely know: a favour you'd rather not do, pushback after you say no, a disagreement, someone else's mood, and your own time. The same situations are asked for each relationship, so the comparison is fair. About thirteen minutes.
Imagine yourself in each situation and choose what you would most likely do, not what you think you should do. Take the details as given: who is asking, whether it's urgent, and what saying no would or wouldn't lead to. Some situations are asked with different people on purpose, and none of them is urgent or genuinely your responsibility. If a relationship doesn't apply to you (for example, you don't have a partner or don't work), choose “Not applicable”.
- 29 questions
- About 13 minutes
- All questions need an answer
Who it's for
Adults who want to understand how much they bend to other people's needs and expectations, in everyday life, work and relationships.
What it can't tell you
- Whether you have any mental health condition or personality disorder
- Why you developed these habits
- How other people see you
No sign-up needed. Your answers are saved with an anonymous ID in this browser so you can see your result. You can delete them any time on the Privacy page.